The women’s secret is out! A list of vagina practices has been constructed by AlterNet, to give you an idea of what women are ready to do to keep the fellas happy. And you might not really want this information. But, here they are posted up on a sheet for all to see:

1) Labiaplasty-Trimming the fat

Some vaginas have a few more miles on them than others, so there’s a little reconstructive surgery for the sagging labia or “lips” surrounding the vagina. It’s just a little something the ladies do to perk up the poo poo for a mere $5,000.
2) Vaginal Rejuvenation-Tightey Whitey

If you have a few dollars laying around and feel you don’t have time to do the kegel exercises necessary to keep your “girl” tight, well there’s help for a loosey goosey. The American Urogynocology Society doesn’t recommend or endorse it, but here ya go! There’s this rogue plastic surgeon out there, just kidding! He’s legit (we think). He’s been on E! channel’s Dr. 90210. Anyway, his name is Dr. David Matlock and he does soemthing called Laser Vaginal Rejuvenation for about $4,000 to $20,000 and he promises your vagina will take you back to your sweet 16.

3) Douching-It Smells!

Women have been douching for many, many, many years. The practice is said to rid the vagina of odors and just keep a healthy vagina by using the age old method. There used to be the rubber bag hanging in the bathroom with the long, slender, hose, but then women said Halleluiah across the nation when Summer’s Eve and Massengill thought of them and turned it into a packaged quick little bottle. But, the medical community has been fighting for women for years to stop the practice and simply run by a gynecologist if they’re having issues with smell or anything else. They have linked the practice of douching with ectopic pregnancies, pelvic inflammatory disease and other issues that should make you stop.

But many doctors disagree. The American Urogynocology Society won’t endorse it. And the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists cautioned in a 2007 statement that women seeking “designer vaginas” should be “informed about the lack of data supporting the efficacy of these procedures and their potential complications, including infection, altered sensation, dyspareunia, adhesions, and scarring.” Sexy!

4. Problem: Your Vagina is Ugly
Solution: Labiaplasty

If your vagina is tight enough (and let’s face it, it’s probably not) you’ve still got to deal with the labia. And by “deal with,” I mean remove. Labiaplasty drastically reduces the labia, the protruding lips that surround the opening of the vagina. Why would you want to do this? Because your labia are “unequal,” “elongated,” “large,” “irregular,” “floppy,” and “unfeminine.” These are just some of the unflattering adjectives bandied about on the Web sites of surgeons who offer this procedure. Luckily, with the use of lasers and scalpels, your vagina can be made “prettier,” “better proportioned,” “youthful,” and achieve “the true Playboy aesthetic look.” How much will it cost you to make your labia proportional and feminine? About $5,000 or more.