Archive for the Category »Poetry «
Three Teachers Mock Black History Month with Rodman, RuPaul and O.J. Black History Month has truly come to a close…and with what three white male teachers would call a “bang.” The school, which is 90% latino, was putting on a Black History Month parade where the children would carry pictures of famous African Americans. Well the bang those teachers were trying to make was in the form of Dennis Rodman (basketball player gone wild), RuPaul (drag queen of all drag queens), and O.J. Simpson (football player done lost his damn mind…acquitted of murdering his wife and her friend, yet still manages to land in jail for armed robbery). It appears that the teachers little jokey joke blew up in their faces. But, the only explosion was their jobs going up in flames. According to the Associated Press, the teachers have been removed from the classroom. But if the NAACP’s Los Angeles chapter president, Leon Jenkins, has anything to say about it, they will be fired. It all happened Friday at Wadsworth Avenue Elementary School in South Los Angeles. One of the parents, Sharon Tinson, told AP she was shocked to see O.J., but she “just laughed.” She has two daughters that attend the school. She also said, “Simpson, like Rodman, was a great athlete before falling from grace. RuPaul simply has an alternative lifestyle, she added.
What I Want In a Man, Original List
1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially successful
4.. A caring listener
5. Witty
6. In good shape
7. Dresses with style
8. Appreciates finer things
9. Full of thoughtful surprises
What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 32)
1. Nice looking
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries
What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 42)
1. Not too ugly
2. Doesn’t drive off until I’m in the car
3. Works steady – splurges on dinner out occasionally
4. Nods head when I’m talking
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down
10. Shaves most weekends
What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 52)
1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
2. Doesn’t belch or scratch in public
3. Doesn’t borrow money too often
4. Doesn’t nod off to sleep when I’m venting
5. Doesn’t re-tell the same joke too many times
6. Is in good enough shape to get off the couch on weekends
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear
8. Appreciates a good TV dinner
9. Remembers your name on occasion
10. Shaves some weekends
What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 62)
1. Doesn’t scare small children
2. Remembers where bathroom is
3. Doesn’t require much money for upkeep
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
5. Remembers why he’s laughing
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears some clothes
8. Likes soft foods
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Remembers that it’s the weekend
What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 72)
1. Breathing.
2. Doesn’t miss the toilet.
Why is it sometimes life is a rude awakening. Can’t it just be awaken without the rude shyt.
Anyhoo, this is a month of changes for you. It started out on a good note, so let’s continue that here.
You will have many grand, and I mean grand opportunities to push yourself forward. There is
adventure waiting for you Pisces. You like to read, have you thought about writing a book or something
of that nature well you should, you have the talent for it. Try it sometimes just start writing on a piece
of paper and see what develops.
Finances – you will be helping the family this month.
Relationships – so many women, so many men not enough time so you say………………………….
Married couples, time to start planning that Summer vacation, somewhere near water of course.
Children – Patience is a virtue true enough, but nothing like a parents love and forgiveness.
Be Careful driving this month, stress might be a little high, try to remain calm.
Don’t let them see you coming, why…..because your better than that, that’s why.
Well look who is moving up in the world ole Cappy. This month will see big purchases, your finances
have finally truly improve, surprise, surprise, surprise Capricorn. Remember the little people, and charities,
(smile). Be careful to always read the fine print and bottom line, consult a attorney or accountant,
prior to any big decisions. This is the month to project all those latent ideas you have had on the back
burner and move them all forward. Sit down and discuss your ideas with confidante and see what comes
up.
Relationships – Love seems to have went by-by for the moment. Not to worry by the months ends you
will be on fire female/male. Try not to be so stubborn, learn to give more remember it is better to give than
receive sometime Cappy. Communications and understanding will be your high points for the month.
Children – stop being an enabler.
Job – Prepare for that raise or proposal to submit, you just might get a yes!
Start your garden, seeds planted now can only bring love and joy.
To be free, run free thoughout all enternity (not) get real, you know who you are quit dreaming,
come back to the light (caroline)lol lol lol. How did we get to here, is the question you keep asking
yourself, when dealing with the job, and family. This is a month when you might sure enough bite
a hole in your lip to keep from really saying what you want to say, just grab a tissue and wipe the
blood from your lips and keep a pushin!
Finances – folks need to understand, the bank is closed until further notice.
Relationships – Friends seem to be needy this month. Employees have a hard time understanding why lay offs, furloughs it’s the nature of our economcis at the present time. Don’t let what is occuring around
you make you become a bitter person. Project yourself and this too shall pass.
Children – Some of you Sags will be dealing with being a counselor, advisor in behalf of your children.
You just can not have youth and experience at the same time – never happen.
Somethings will calm down in a few areas like home life. Isn’t it wonderful when things finally come
together correctly as they should. Now business for Scorpio employed or employer will be enhance
by several new ideas. Example, communication, equipment, committees, conferences, employees.
It almost like the 4Th of July folks are just bursting with ideas. You are the one to network these
folks and bring it all together. Challenge and change have met their match when it comes to Scorpio.
Finances – will continue to improve.
Relationships – come to an understanding – YOU ARE A LOTTO TICKET!
Children – Well as I stated earlier things around the ole homestead will calm down considerably. For
right now until the end of March, then things might get a little dicey. (expect a smart mouth)
This month Scorpio treat yourself to something or someone special you deserve some me time!
You are finally coming out from under a lot of stress good for you. Now don’t over do it. For
some Gemini’s you have found love, from humans to animals (congrats OK). Your cute but not
special, lol lol. Anyhoo, life is kinda contradictory at times for you of late. Well heck what did
you expect your a Gemini 2 peoples (smile).. Soon most material matters will clear up shortly,
so you can exhale and breathe again. This you most certainly understand. Your ideas at your
job have not fallen on deaf ears. It’s call budgetary matters, in other words wait and see.
Finances – is it time to upgrade? Like clothes, vehicle, living quarters. Try it you might like it.
Relationships – You are going thru an awakening period, fresh seen thru new eyes, and understanding.
So be it my dear, let it bloom. As lovers, friends, etc. i.e.
Herbie Hancock Celebration Part of NYC Jazz Festival. Herbie Hancock will be honored at a belated 70th birthday party at Carnegie Hall this spring that will double as the revival of a major summer jazz festival in the Big Apple. The pianist, who turns 70 on April 12, will be joined by comedian Bill Cosby, saxophonist Joe Lovano, trumpeter Terence Blanchard, and saxophonist Wayne Shorter, Hancock’s bandmate in Miles Davis’ famed 1960s quintet, with more guests to be announced. The June 24 concert, “Herbie Hancock, Seven Decades: The Birthday Celebration,” will benefit The Thelonious Monk Institute of Jazz. “That will be a very exciting night — perhaps one of the unique nights in the history of the festival with a lot of people coming just to salute Herbie,” the festival’s producer, George Wein, told the Associated Press Friday. The concert will be followed by a festival first — an old-time midnight jam session paying tribute to Hancock — at the City Winery nightclub. The CareFusion Jazz Festival will run from June 17 to 26 with some 45 concerts at 20 venues, including concert halls, parks, museums and libraries in four boroughs. Carnegie Hall will be the site of three other high-profile concerts featuring trumpeter Chris Botti, Brazilian bossa nova maestro Joao Gilberto, and the trio of pianist Keith Jarrett, bassist Gary Peacock and drummer Jack DeJohnette. There will also be several free outdoor concerts, with Latin jazz star Eddie Palmieri performing in a Bronx park and pianist McCoy Tyner’s quartet featuring saxophonist Ravi Coltrane and the Stanley Clarke Band with Japanese pianist Hiromi playing at Central Park’s SummerStage. The festival is paying the musicians and letting the clubs collect the gate, asking only that ticket prices be kept at a recession-friendly $15 for most events. “It’s helping the clubs and the musicians,” said Wein. “Its our own stimulus program.”
Whitney Houston Tour has Fans Asking for Refunds. There have been multiple reports in the past week calling Whitney Houston’s overseas tour performances a complete disaster and that she’s been asked to postpone some dates due to her “fragile condition.” The latest complaints come from Australian fans, who apparently watched as the diva flubbed her way through a concert in Brisbane on Monday night. Popeater is reporting that the 46-year-old “took a break after just two songs, brought her brother onstage to hit her high notes and slurped from a water bottle through a closing performance of ‘I Will Always Love You.’” One concertgoer told the press outside: “She couldn’t entertain a dead rat.” Monday’s performance at the Brisbane Entertainment Centre was the first of several Australian stops on Houston’s “Nothing But Love” comeback tour. On Tuesday (Feb. 23), concert promoter Andrew McManus defended the singer against the many ticket purchasers calling for a refund. “It was not a train wreck,” McManus told Agence France-Presse of Houston’s performance. “She was hitting most of the notes; yes, her throat was a little croaky. Her health is fine, but she’s also not 22 years of age anymore.” According to concert reviews cited by the AFP, Houston also appeared disoriented during the show, relied heavily upon backup singers and struggled to remember the names of her band members. “This show was like watching a slow and painful death of a living legend,” a Courier-Mail reader wrote in. Last week, a rep for Whitney Houston denied rumors that the “Million Dollar Bill” singer is in ill health following poor performances in Japan. According to the National Enquirer, Houston was urged to postpone upcoming live dates “after a string of health problems in recent months.” But her spokesperson called the article “rubbish” and “ridiculous.” In fact, she has added three more dates to her upcoming U.K. leg, which kicks off in Manchester on April 8.
BEST POEM IN THE WORLD
I was shocked, confused, bewildered
As I entered Heaven’s door,
Not by the beauty of it all,
Nor the lights or its decor.
But it was the folks in Heaven
Who made me sputter and gasp–
The thieves, the liars, the sinners,
The alcoholics and the trash.
There stood the kid from seventh grade
Who swiped my lunch money twice.
Next to him was my old neighbor
Who never said anything nice.
Herb, who I always thought
Was rotting away in hell,
Was sitting pretty on cloud nine,
Looking incredibly well.
I nudged Jesus, ‘What’s the deal?
I would love to hear Your take.
How’d all these sinners get up here?
God must’ve made a mistake.
‘And why is everyone so quiet,
So somber – give me a clue.’
‘Hush, child,’ He said, ‘they’re all in shock.
No one thought they’d be seeing you.’
JUDGE NOT!!
Remember…Just going to church doesn’t make you a
Christian any more than standing in your garage makes you a car.
Every saint has a PAST…
Every sinner has a FUTURE!
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